Reading People

Many people have great difficulty in reading other people, because they also have
difficulty in reading themselves. These people often spend so much time covering up
their own frailties with fa├žades, internal blocks and verbal excuses that they often
don't really bother getting to know others very well. All too often the non-thinking,
emotional part of their brain expresses itself more frequently than the analytical,
evaluating side of the brain. When such people do make an evaluation of another
person, it often winds up being only an unconscious mirror version of what they
have never admitted seeing in themselves. The more out of touch with yourself you
are, the more inclined you are to produce a mirror reading of yourself for another
person. When you learn to recognize undesirable emotional states in yourself, you're
taking the 1st step toward changing these states. Reading other people accurately
becomes easier for you then, because you act more like an observer.
Now as an exercise,
A) List 4 things in a notebook that would engulf you with compassion and love for
your fellow man.
B) List 4 things that would fill you with happiness, joy or contentment.
C) List 4 things that would surge you with excitement.
D) List 4 things that would flare you into anger.
Misreading people and their intentions can often lead to trouble and great difficulty
in your daily life. How you learn or don't learn from such difficulties can help OR
hinder you later in life. Voice inflection, body mannerisms and eye expressions can
be discerned subconsciously when you read people, or you can just as easily learn
to read these signals consciously. For instance, great salespeople often observe
carefully the body movements of potential customers. By mirroring and matching the
body language and energy level of those they are about to sell to, good salespeople
can thus establish a better buying receptivity in potential customers, because people
generally feel more comfortable with other people that are like themselves.
How well do you feel you know your friends and relatives? Do you feel you see
them as they are or as they pretend to be or both? First of all, let's see how you see
yourself. Now look at the words and phrases on the next page, and choose the
appropriate words applicable for your own personality by putting a check mark
beside them. If you photostat this sheet ahead of time and give it to your friends and
relatives, you can see how you see each other.


ADJECTIVAL EVALUATION SHEET

______________________________

Fill in the name of the person.

Check those applicable words & phrases for the above individual:

argumentative shrewd materialistic

stuffy diplomatic vindictive

insecure confident insensitive

easily angered jovial trivial

selfish unselfish aggressive

timid intelligence average friendly

intelligence high quick witted talkative

adventurous cautious patient

impatient erotic contemplative

intense caring giving

submissive deceptive trustworthy

untrustworthy disciplined undisciplined

lazy minded dangerous materialistic

peaceful close-minded devious

efficient independent critical

childish unstable thoughtful

boisterous inquisitive curious

tolerant intolerant restrictive

domineering secure dishonest

honest knowledgeable skillful

quick learner interesting agreeable

intriguing logical illogical

emotionally stable nervous creative

healthy unhealthy loving

assertive a leader type understanding

candid fearful stubborn

frugal wasteful helpful

sloppy compassionate sympathetic

polite open-minded disagreeable

If there are any words you feel you would like to add to the list for your

description, please do so.



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